THERE'S A FLY IN MY NEWS

By Dan Miller
April 12, 2007

Could it be that house flies actually enjoy appearing on television?
What else could explain why these nasty little insects always show up in our TV studio -- flying around in front of our cameras -- pestering us as we’re broadcasting the news?

Every year, starting when the weather warms up -- and lasting deep into autumn -- big, fat, noisy house flies (seemingly the size of hummingbirds) become regular visitors in studio A, where our evening newscasts take place.
Most days, at least one or two are there.

And they seem to have a specific strategy of buzzing the news desk just as we're speaking.

My great fear is one will fly into my mouth as I'm delivering the news.

What puzzles me is this....
Why are they in studio A?
Right next door is studio B.... and I never see them in there.

Studio B is the place where they do the cooking segments on "More At Midday".
With all the food and aromas around, it would make sense for the flies to prefer gathering there.... but no, they seem to like our news desk in studio A.

I can only hope these flies are not "attracted" to me for some reason.... that would be embarrassing.
And I refuse to even suggest that my co-anchor, Demetria, is drawing flies!

Here's something you can watch and listen for at home.
Occasionally, you might catch a glimpse (or hear the sounds) of me or Demetria actually swatting at the flies with rolled up news script.
Of course, I always try to do it when we're not on camera.... unless it lands on my nose.

During commercial breaks we often discuss ways to keep the flies away.

For example, someone suggested that -- since the door is usually opened between studio A and studio B -- perhaps we should place some manure in studio B to lure the flies over there.
Not a bad idea, but then I thought, "Maybe someone who works in studio B has already taken that step, in reverse."
That would explain a lot.
I'd better watch my step.

Hopefully, our bosses will hire a professional exterminator to eliminate the flies from the studio this summer.

Of course, house flies have been around for 65,000,000 years....
probably pestering the earliest cavemen as they attempted to verbalize whatever news was happening that day around the cave.
So I’m not expecting a quick fix!

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