THE BIG CHILL FACTOR

BY DAN MILLER
August 10, 2006

I saw the movie "The Big Chill" more than 20 years ago, and -- since then -- I really hadn't thought much about it.

But I have been thinking about it in recent days.
You'll recall the plot.
Years after graduating from college, a group of friends are unexpectedly reunited for the funeral of a former classmate.
And by the closing credits, they have a new understanding of life and friendship.

Well, occasionally things like that happens in real life.

On Friday of last week -- the day of Paul Eells' funeral -- I spent 12 hours inside a car, traveling to and from Little Rock, with three old friends.
That's us in the picture, Rudy Kalis, Jim Curry, Charlie McAlexander and me.

The 12 hours zipped by.
In the close confines of that vehicle, we reminisced about Paul.... his family.... our families.... times we had spent together years ago.... football games.... teams and coaches.... we quizzed each other on sports and music trivia.... and shared news of family triumphs and tragedies.

The clerk in a convenience store near Jackson snapped that picture of us as we were headed back to Nashville late Friday night.

It was a trip none of us wanted to make.
Our mission was to carry our friend's casket to his grave.
But we laughed, we cried, we told stories and we sang.
When it was over, the four of us felt a unique bond and rejuvenated friendships.

But there's more to the story.
On the day I got the news of Paul's death, I notified Mike Kettenring, the former general manager here at Channel 4, who left the TV business when his wife died -- and is now a Catholic priest in New Orleans. (That's another whole fascinating story).
I had not seen Mike in a couple of years.
Mike told me he would drive up to Nashville this week, and we'd have lunch.
Again, Paul's death was stirring the impulse to reconnect with long time friends.

Shortly after talking with Mike, I got a call from another old pal, John Tesh.
John had worked at Channel 4 with Mike, Paul and me more than 30 years ago.
John became one of my closest friends and confidants, but -- hard to believe -- 14 years had slipped by between phone calls.

John got word in California about Paul's death.
He too felt the tug of old friendships.
He wanted to fly in from Los Angeles to have lunch with Mike and me.
And he did.

So this second photo is of John, Father Mike and me.... spending two-and-a-half hours over lunch.... laughing, telling stories, catching up on our lives, and promising to stay in touch.... to get together more often.
Maybe we will.

There's a great power in having old friends.
I consider these gatherings a testimonial to the impact of Paul Eells, who's now officially a guardian angel of friendship.

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